We are in a truth of our own making. Although we once may have been a victim of a circumstance that we had no control over, as an adult that situation is not our present moment.
However, how we choose to be in this moment may be a result of the trauma programming of those situations.
If I continue to see myself as a victim from that situation, I will continue to show up as a victim in the present moments. I will enter the room, create conversation and even my own thoughts will be from this belief that I am “the victim “.
Here comes a real twist, I may even become the perpetrator or hero so I can then come back around to my most comfortable place, the victim.
I will pick a fight, create a situation that I can manipulate and believe I have control over so I can fall back on the victim role.
I will also find away of taking all things said and done as a personal attack on me. Even the things I created, I will find away to turn it around so that I need to be saved.
I have found those people in my life who will feed this need and keep them inside my programming. I will also feed their need as I become their hero, their victim. I will also complete this triangle by being the perpetrator so that I keep this unhealthy cycle going.
I may even recognize this is happening, but it is so comfortable to bond in this trauma triangle, that I fall from the place I Am attempting to heal from, back to my chosen reality of I am a victim, no I’m the hero, no wait you can’t treat me like that, I’m now the perpetrator or am I the victim? I get so lost in my trauma bond that I confuse myself of who and what I am.
We remain in the loop or continuum of this self supported reality claiming differently, but not much has changed. We only get glimpses of change or we take great strides, only to return back to that comfortable place when something hits us firmly and we get knocked off our not so solid foundation.
I say I am healed, but my actions and words say other wise, when life doesn’t show up in it’s nice and neat little package with it’s pretty perfectly tied bow on it.
I can speak on this because it has been a struggle in my own life. I see it only after it happens, sometimes. Other times I head it off before I get there, that’s a victory! The most amazing ones are the ones I don’t even see I did it! It just happens because I am truly healed from that situation and my foundation is solid and repaired from that trauma. I no longer respond from the triangle mentality.
The truth is, we are not victims, we don’t need hero’s and we create or allow perpetrators in our own perceptions of life.
There has to be a perpetrator if I am going to show up as a victim. I can’t save someone unless they are victimized. I can’t find a victim, be the hero unless there is a perpetrator and sometimes I become that so I can be the other two.
It is a vicious cycle and is as unhealthy as it gets! I continue the programming set forth by my generational ancestors and pass it on to my linage through my actions just as they did to me. The curse continues and I’m the wicked who curses them and myself!
By the way, since we are all one, all connected, linage is not just blood family. It is all, everyone we entangle in our web of deceit and betrayal. They become part of a triangle that lays upon triangle after triangle.
Here is a big T truth, no one is coming to save you from this. You can and will have guides, but no one can save you. If they say the can, then guess what, they are stepping into that hero role and you guessed it, you are the victim once again!
We have to be willing to look at this, look within ourselves and see this reality we are creating. We have to be willing to step out of the triangle and do something different. But first we have to be able to recognize the existence of the triangle and how we fit into it. What role we are taking on and what action needs to be taken to stop the cycle or the continuum.
I can’t save you from you, but I can lead you out of this poverty, lack mentally… This is what Jesus was saying, “follow me”. “ By your faith you are healed”, believe in yourself and receive Love. “Let the dead bury the dead”, let those whom want to not live the abundant life of joy continue on their journey of death.
We can all be guides to one another just as Jesus was! We have to be able to step out of our own triangles first! If not we just add more layers upon the triangles of traumas and death. I do not want to wait to die to experience Heaven, I want to bring Heaven to earth. I can only do that for myself, no hero can do that. The Kingdom is within, He is inside me and when I see that I am not my yesterday, I get to see that this moment is beautiful and it is where God lives! Love is in this moment and if I choose it, if I Am willing to, I can remove the curse, build a solid foundation and live in peace and joy!
It does not matter the situation, it only matters how I choose to be in the situation in this moment!
I Am not a victim! I no longer wish to be a perpetrator! I can’t save anyone and I do not desire to be a hero! I do however want to Love, be Love because that is what I was sent here to do and experience! It is all up to me, to be willing, to choose and to rest in!
If you look at your life, if you pause for a moment, you will see this triangle in your relationships. You have to be willing to look at it objectively, cautiously and truthfully. It is the only way you can change it and heal.
You are the common denominator in every relationship you have. You are in it as one of the corners of the triangle or you are an observer from a place of Love.
You can continue on in this trauma triangle or find peace outside of it. You do not have to enter in it unless you want to. It really is a choice, no one can pull you in to it unless you are willing to go.
The willingness to do something different is a great place to start! The choosing of a better life, by following the way, through the truth, is seeking the Kingdom of Love within! It’s there, you’ve seen it just as I have. We have all had those moments of peace, kindness, forgiveness and Love of a higher self.
Why wouldn’t we want more of that? It seems silly to keep repeating that same old life style when we have felt something better.
The next time you feel like a victim or you rush in to be the hero, pause and ask yourself if this is what you really desire. Depending on how you answer, you will know what to do!
For me, I have found more peace in my own life, a higher self and Love like I have never known in myself and then I get to have better relationships full abundant joy and Love! It is possible, all is possible through Love! All is possible through faith! Anything can change if we are willing!